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Wellness for Women Over 40 Series: Part 10

Self Actualization: How to Reach Your Highest Potential

· Women,Self Actualization,Success

Hi, I know you think I have a set of principles to reach your highest potential, and achieve your wildest dreams, right? Well, not exactly. I mean, we must have principles to live by, and the self-discipline to carry them out, thus, whatever we desire to happen in life must come from a place of truth. Let's start with truth: what do you know to be true about yourself? Who are you? Where did you come from? Who do you belong to? Why are you here? Where are you going? Once you can begin to answer and firmly believe in the answers to the preceding questions, life will become one with you. Yes, you will know that you are life, and you do life, it doesn't do you!

Indeed, when we fail to realize that we are alive and well eternally, we get caught in the lies that come to mind often that tells us we are limited, not good enough, second class, too little, too much, and so on. Truthfully, these thoughts cause us to be covetous, jealous, resentful, pessimistic, and hopeless. Listen, God does not respond to pessimism, doubtfulness, and careless speech. Hence, many prayers go unanswered! We are called to a higher form of life, that allows us to not feel the pangs of this life. We are well and able to do all that God had called to be and do. The day we begin to believe that, then and only then our lives would take a turn for the better. So, I ask you, why not today? Aren't you tired of being a lint ball, or magnet collecting all the negative energy this life holds? It's time you free yourself from this torment. Do it for you, your family, and most of all, do it for God. We can't lose being grateful for everything we are and can be. This, in fact, is the only key to success, and reaching our highest potential, being GRATEFUL!

According to Psychology Today (2013):


“Self-actualization” represents a concept derived from Humanistic psychological theory and, specifically, from the theory created by Abraham Maslow. Self-actualization, according to Maslow, represents growth of an individual toward fulfillment of the highest needs; those for meaning in life, in particular. Carl Rogers also created a theory implicating a “growth potential” whose aim was to integrate congruently the “real self” and the “ideal self” thereby cultivating the emergence of the “fully functioning person”. It was Maslow, however, who created a psychological hierarchy of needs, the fulfillment of which theoretically leads to a culmination of the fulfillment of “being values”, or the needs that are on the highest level of this hierarchy, representing meaning.

Maslow’s hierarchy reflects a linear pattern of growth depicted in a direct pyramidal order of ascension. Moreover, he states that self-actualizing individuals are able to resolve dichotomies such as that reflected in the ultimate contrary of free-will and determinism. He also contends that self-actualizers are highly creative, psychologically robust individuals. It is argued herein that a dialectical transcendence of ascension toward self-actualization better describes this type of self-actualization, and even the mentally ill, whose psychopathology correlates with creativity, have the capacity to self-actualize.

Further, Self-Actualization is summed up in these steps of the life process, according to Psychology Today (2013) using Abraham Maslov's Hierarchy of Needs Pyramid:


Maslow’s hierarchy is described as follows:

1. Physiological needs, such as needs for food, sleep, and air.

2. Safety, or the needs for security and protection, especially those that emerge from social or political instability.

3. Belonging and love including, the needs of deficiency and selfish taking instead of giving, and unselfish love that is based upon growth rather than deficiency.

4. Needs for self-esteem, self-respect, and healthy, positive feelings derived from admiration.

5. And “being” needs concerning creative self-growth, engendered from the fulfillment of potential and meaning in life.

So, at the most vulnerable of stages lies an opportunity to grow to each level with confidence, yet most people don't really get the chance due to lack of good parenting and guidance. What happens most times is that we have to experience life through a mirror, this mirror is always showing us what we look like and how we should perceive ourselves during each stage of life. The real issue is, do we know what we see in the mirror? Honestly, if we don't have a clue how to address the way we look, act, and choose to live in that moment; then we miss the chance of true self-growth. Hence, coming into who we truly are is short lived or is seen in the distance.

It is my prayer that you find the courage to get to know who you really are and to see fully the potential that is there, to come into a zone of awareness and thus, reach your highest potential. I want to thank all of you for being on this journey and to know that you are worth finding out who you truly are. You can access the prior posts here on my blog, start at the beginning and even go over some things you may need clarity on. Feel free to check out my author page, where I have books and pamphlets that can help you find your purpose in life and in vocation, whether it's being a better parent, servant and simply being a better person, here: and also my health and wellness store, where you can pick and choose products that have helped me on my health journey, ones that have helped me to heal, and just feel better! Click the link below to my health and wellness store.

With the culmination of one's state of awareness, and presence in the zone of authenticity and abundance you are now able to pursue purposeful unions. These purposeful unions encompass the areas of intimate relationships, financial and business partnerships, and that of leading groups of people on their life's journey. You will never attain the solid foundation needed in these unions before actualizing yourself in the place you know you belong and are called to be. This is the whole sum of life, to know that you are life and life is you. Trust me, you hold all the cards!

So, enjoy life because you are worth it! I invite you to join me on my next teaching and coaching series entitled: "Purposeful Unions" a series for people who want to create success in every area of life. See you there!

"The thief cometh not, but for to steal, and to kill, and to destroy: I am come that they might have life, and that they might have it more abundantly." ~ John 10:10 (KJV)

Your Higher Self Coach,

Crystal E. Melville

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